About This Book

- 🧠 **Emotional Influence**: Our emotional reactions (System 1) shape our rational decisions (System 2), highlighting the importance of understanding feelings in negotiations. - 👂 **Active Listening**: Listening intently and validating emotions fosters trust and rapport, making it easier for counterparts to express their needs and desires. - ⏳ **Pace Matters**: Rushing through negotiations can undermine trust; taking time to listen and connect is crucial for effective communication. - 🔄 **Power of "No"**: Encouraging the other party to say "No" can create a sense of safety and control, opening the door for more honest dialogue and negotiation. - 🎤 **Voice as a Tool**: Your tone and delivery can significantly impact communication; using techniques like labeling and mirroring can enhance connection and understanding.

Top Highlights

• It all starts with the universally applicable premise that people want to be understood and accepted. Listening is the cheapest, yet most effective concession we can make to get there. By listening intensely, a negotiator demonstrates empathy and shows a sincere desire to better understand what the other side is experiencing.
• Negotiation as you’ll learn it here is nothing more than communication with results. Getting what you want out of life is all about getting what you want from—and with—other people. Conflict between two parties is inevitable in all relationships. So it’s useful—crucial, even—to know how to engage in that conflict to get what you want without inflic...
• The goal is to identify what your counterparts actually need (monetarily, emotionally, or otherwise) and get them feeling safe enough to talk and talk and talk some more about what they want. The latter will help you discover the former.
• That’s why your most powerful tool in any verbal communication is your voice. You can use your voice to intentionally reach into someone’s brain and flip an emotional switch.
• But neither wants nor needs are where we start; it begins with listening, making it about the other people, validating their emotions, and creating enough trust and safety for a real conversation to begin.