STOP WAISTING Your Time & Look For These RED FLAGS In A Relationship! | LILY COLLINS & Jay Shetty | Summary and Q&A

Transcript

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Summary

In this video, Lily Collins discusses her experiences in past toxic relationships, the lessons she learned from them, and how it shaped her journey towards self-love and finding true, healthy relationships. She also talks about the importance of speaking up and not allowing shame to prevent healing and growth. Additionally, she shares insights into her acting career and how it serves as a form of meditation and self-exploration.

Questions & Answers

Q: How did Lily find meaning and lessons in her past toxic relationships?

Lily explains that she has always been introspective and reflective. Despite moments of not realizing the toxicity in her relationship, she eventually came to understand the wrongness of certain behaviors. She felt small, belittled, and silenced but also still saw glimpses of kindness, which made leaving the relationship difficult. Despite these challenges, Lily acknowledges that her experiences have made her stronger and taught her important lessons about setting boundaries, recognizing mistreatment, and finding her own voice.

Q: How did Lily's toxic relationship affect her self-esteem and how did she rebuild it?

Lily shares that being in a toxic relationship had a significant impact on her self-esteem. She found herself losing touch with friends and family due to the manipulative nature of the relationship. She felt that her self-worth and validation relied on her partner's attention, causing her to question her identity and decision-making abilities. It led to panic attacks and physical symptoms like bad skin. However, with support from loved ones and internal reflection, Lily was able to regain her self-esteem. Rebuilding relationships and finding her voice helped her redefine her worth and learn how to set boundaries.

Q: How did Lily differentiate her current healthy relationship from her toxic ones, and what advice does she have for spotting healthy dynamics?

Lily emphasizes that all relationships have ups and downs, including healthy ones. However, in her toxic relationship, she felt physically ill, anxious, and small. Being shushed and having her identity suppressed was a clear sign of toxicity. In her current relationship, she feels heard, supported, and encouraged to be her best self. She highlights the importance of recognizing red flags, such as someone using love or affection as a tool to manipulate or control, discouraging relationships with others, or making a person feel trapped. She encourages individuals not to compare their relationships to others and emphasizes the value of open communication, genuine support, and respecting boundaries.

Q: How does acting serve as a form of meditation for Lily and help her discover more about herself?

Lily sees acting as a form of meditation because it allows her to be present and deeply connected to her emotions. She describes acting as a way to take people on a journey, much like bedtime stories from her childhood. The process of researching a character, finding similarities and differences, and exploring various emotions and experiences helps her learn more about herself. Acting forces her to be in the present moment, similar to how being present and attentive in a conversation is crucial. She cherishes those moments in acting when she feels fully present and connected, akin to deep stillness and meditation.

Q: Which role made Lily reflect the most about herself off-screen?

Lily mentions her role in the movie "To the Bone" where she played a character struggling with eating disorders. The role resonated deeply with her because she had recently opened up about her experiences with eating disorders in her book. It felt like a serendipitous connection between her art and life. Playing the character allowed her to explore the similarities and dive into her own personal growth and healing. It also enabled her to let go of certain aspects she thought she had already overcome. Through professional input and personal insight, the role served as a significant opportunity for healing and letting go of past challenges.

Q: Does Lily's openness about her own experiences help other young actresses and individuals in the industry seek advice and insights from her?

Lily shares that she has received emails from people within the industry who have dealt with similar challenges but feel unable to publicly discuss them. Her openness about her experiences, especially regarding mental health and eating disorders, has allowed others to feel less alone and provided them with a sense of shared understanding. Lily believes in creating a community of support rather than perpetuating false perceptions about actresses being immune to struggles. She encourages more young people in the public eye to be authentic and not project false images, as it perpetuates harmful comparisons and stereotypes.

Q: What drew Lily towards the role of Emily in "Emily in Paris"?

Lily chased after the role of Emily because she was attracted to the character's qualities. She saw Emily as a bright, optimistic, and confident young woman who is unapologetically herself. The opportunity to play a character in a rom-com set in Paris, two cultures close to her heart, was appealing. Lily felt a personal connection to Emily's journey of self-love and embracing her strength and uniqueness. She also acknowledges that the series provides escapism and the ability to make people laugh and smile, something she believes is a gift she wants to share with the world.

Q: In what way is "Emily in Paris" a story of self-love?

Lily explains that "Emily in Paris" goes beyond being just a story about romance. She sees it as a journey of self-love, personal growth, and self-discovery. Emily's experiences in the city of love allow her to learn more about herself, her likes, dislikes, and strengthen her sense of identity. The character's ability to confidently say no, recognize what doesn't align with her needs, and stay unapologetically herself are key aspects of her self-love journey. Lily believes that people can learn a lot about self-love through the character's experiences and be inspired to embrace their own uniqueness and strengths.

Takeaways

Lily Collins shares her personal experiences in toxic relationships and how she learned valuable lessons from them. She emphasizes the importance of not allowing shame to hold back healing and growth, encouraging individuals to speak up and find their voice. Lily also discusses the meditative nature of acting, how it fosters self-exploration, and allows her to be deeply present. In her role in "Emily in Paris," she sees a story of self-love and emphasizes the strength in being unapologetically oneself. She encourages open communication, recognizing red flags, and embracing personal growth and boundary-setting in healthy relationships.